Living Life on Your Terms

Dogma, according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, means:

1

  a : something held as an established opinion; especially : a definite authoritative tenet

  b : a code of such tenets <pedagogical dogma>

  c : a point of view or tenet put forth as authoritative without adequate grounds

2

  : a doctrine or body of doctrines concerning faith or morals formally stated and authoritatively proclaimed       by a church

I, however, like the definition that Steve Jobs gave at the end of this video.

“Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

Looking back on my life, I know now that great harm (speaking of myself) has come from trying to please others and to live up to their expectations. Why should I care more about what you think about me, than what I think about me? My view of the world, sex, career, and God has been shaped by religion, Church, culture and parents. Looking back, I regret taking many bits and pieces of advice from others, especially when they knew less on something than I did. I'm sure they meant well, but good intentions can still hurt people. I was thinking about it earlier this week and could not help but ponder where my life would be had I not followed the advice of others. It saddens me, but perhaps this is what I needed to stop being such a people-pleaser in the first place. I don't often like to give advice, but I will give you this nugget of wisdom. Stop listening and trying to please your parents, pastor or priest, friends, relatives, etc. They don't live your life. And they don't have to pay the consequences from the choices you make. You do. Be a noble man or woman, and make your own choices and be willing to live with the consequences of those choices.